Monday, June 10, 2013

A Marriage Made in Hangul

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It’s been a rather surreal, whirl windy past couple of days.  My girlfriend of the past 8 years, Corinne and I got married at the U.S. embassy on Tuesday June 4th.  I guess it wasn't the epitome of romance, but in another way I’m glad it came off so painlessly.  I was amazed how quickly it all happened.  It’s funny how nothing in life seems to ever go the way you think it will...
            I asked to be let go from work early because the embassy only allows appointments before 3.   Everyone at work was excited for me.   My boss said to me “you’d better hurry if you want to make it”. 
  On the train I was hoping that I wouldn’t somehow miss the stop or go to the wrong part of town.   Life seemed to be going on the same as it always has, it was just another day in Korea. 
  I came out of the underground to see the statue of King Sejong staring down on me.  I put my foot in a tiny stream flowing by.  I saw the Star Spangled banner stuck limply to a pole in front of the heavily fortified compound.  The palace wavered in the early afternoon heat. 
 I waited under a tree near the exit for Corinne to come out.   I recalled some years earlier how I flew back to Los Angeles from Japan with her meeting me at the gate.  I thought at the time if she wasn’t there, I’d take it as a sign.  Sure enough, 5 minutes later she emerged wearing the elephant pants we bought in Cambodia last winter. 
            We went through the security checkpoint at the embassy http://seoul.usembassy.gov/index.html and surrendered our electronic devices to the uniformed guards.  We went inside and took a number.  After signing some papers, we had to lift our right hands and swear that our written testimony was true.  The guy at the counter said, "if you go around the corner, you can get it apostiled, notarized, and translated so it'll be legal in your home country".  There was a military couple signing papers we asked to be our witnesses and we witnessed their signing too. 
   All together it took 2 hours.  We waited it out at a coffee shop http://www.twosome.co.kr/main.asp and had some chocolate chip frappacinos.  It was enough to quell my growling stomach for the moment.  I thought about all the weddings I had attended and the production value they'd throw behind the theatrics and here I was watching a business meeting take place in the adjacent room.  It was strange that here was another big moment being reduced to another transaction of passing money and stamped pages. 
  We were pretty famished by the end of that and went out for Mexican at our favorite tex-mex restaurant  http://www.ontheborder.com/.  It was a strange time of the day sandwiched between the lunch and dinner crowd, being completely deserted apart from us.  We ordered a fajita platter and a couple of negra modelos.  We had a little dance in the corner to some meringue music for a minute.
  I dropped the news later on Facebook and the likes/well wishes started pouring in from all parts of Asia.  There was a slight delay before the news broke in the States.  It seems as though women are more thrilled about marriages and men are a bit cynical about the institution.
  We met up with a few Korean friends for a few drinks at 'craftworks' pub http://craftworkstaphouse.com/ and had a few weepy words to say.  We took a late night stroll along the military base.
  The next day, it was back to work as if nothing had happened.  My coworker Sharon said, “welcome to a strange club”.  I remember sitting in the train ride home and feeling grown up.   It feels nice to use the word 'wife' and not 'girlfriend' at this point in my life.  In some ways nothing has changed at all, but it has changed the way people perceive us, that's for sure.  I look at the paper and it's all in Hangeul with stamps on it.
  We are going to do a Buddhist ceremony in countryside at the end of the month.  We’re going to say some nice words to each other and exchange rings.  Corinne wants me to write a song for her, but that may be pushing it a bit!
  Hopefully we'll be back in the states next year and can have a proper wedding there.  I feel sort bad things came off like this, but at the same time we were both tired of not being able to plan a year out because we wouldn't know where in the world we'd be.  It’s been hard enough getting these two pussyfoots to any sort of marriage arrangement.  I guess being a child of divorce can set you up with some stumbling blocks if you're not careful.  We’d go back in forth and end up fighting over logistics and end up doing nothing-for years!  We were so concerned we were going to hurt someone's feelings.  I don't know when your life becomes yours either, but we were tired of waiting.  I hope nobody is too upset. 
  We have a little vacation to Thailand scheduled for July http://www.tourismthailand.org/.  I’m looking forward to some swinging hammocks, swaying palm trees, and mango drinks.  Corinne might go do some scuba diving, but that stuff doesn't exactly call my name.
  Anyhow, that's where things are tonight.  I hope everyone is doing all right.  I’m sitting on my darkened roof looking out at the vast expanse of Seoul, sipping a beer , and the glowing pink spire of Namsan tower.